‘Forget about the past and focus on the present and the future.’ This should be the ideal mantra for every person who has undergone a divorce. Remember, divorce does not mean the end of life. Instead, it gives you the opportunity to re-design your future in the best way possible, making sure not to repeat the earlier mistakes. And, to do this, all you need is a strong determination and willpower. Divorce is something that happened yesterday. It is past and cannot be changed, but future can be altered. What needs to be changed is your attitude, your emotional turmoil and your understanding of the situation. In the following lines, we have provided some tips on how to survive a divorce.
Tips For Surviving A Divorce
Re-build Your Self-Esteem
It is the most important thing that you should do after a divorce. Post divorce, you are likely to be very low on self esteem. However, get one fact right in your mind - nobody is perfect. Everyone is entitled to make mistakes, but the person who learns from his/her past mistakes is likely to become a better person with each passing day. Bring out all those long dead and buried aspirations back into your mind and start working on them.
Make Less Demands from Your Ex-spouse
Demanding a feeling of remorse or regret from your ex spouse may come naturally to your mind, but you have to learn to get over it. Instead, strategize your mind, in such a way that you expect nothing from your ex-partner. Remember, if you couldn’t change him/her when both of you were together, you certainly cannot do it even. Do not wait for any kind of apology or justification from him/her. Get one thing straight in your mind - the less you expect, the better you will feel.
Post-divorce, make conscious decisions about what you want to do with you life, as in the coming years. You have all the time in the world to think about your dreams and aspirations and turn them into reality. However, do not indulge in thinking alone. Instead, work towards bringing your dreams closer to reality. Your only goal must be to make your life better than what it was earlier.
Revamp Your Look!!
If you want to feel good, you need to work on your look. Get a new hairstyle and change your wardrobe completely!! This may be surprising to you, but it is a fact that when you look good, you feel good as well. A change in your style statement is likely to make you feel better. Apart from giving you a face-lift, it will also boost your confidence level and self-esteem.
Interact With People
It is often seen that divorcees lock themselves up, in a world led by isolation and seclusion. Think logically. Contrary to what you feel, you have to force yourself out of the feelings of remorse and guilt and continue with your life. Try to interact with people. Make new friends or get in touch with the old ones. Hang out and have fun. This will help you take your mind off the recent loss.
Get Back To Your Hobbies
When did you last play golf or read a book or even sing a song? Very often, while trying hard to make a relationship work, we often lose on the things which we once loved indulging in. So, get back to your hobbies. Do what you loved doing before the marriage. Enroll yourself in a hobby class and make the most of it.