Break ups and separations are not only difficult for couples, but they also affect their children. The emotional turmoil and the pressure to choose one of their parents can be quite difficult for them. Still, a lot depends on the age group of the child and the situations have to be handled accordingly. In case of infants and toddlers, the condition can be dealt in an easier manner, as compared to older children, as the former fail to understand the conflict between their parents. However, the condition is quite different for pre-school children, between the age groups of 3 to 5. They often end up believing that they are the reason for behind parent’s separation and are feel dejected and left out. The situation is even worse for young, school-aged children, who often understand the reason behind their parent’s separation, but are too young to handle their emotions. If not handled in the right way, these feelings and thoughts can grow up into strong emotions later in life, leading to unhealthy lifestyle. Do you want to know how to reconnect with your kids after a break up? If yes, then read on.
Reconnecting With Your Children After Your Divorce
- Never miss an opportunity to tell your children that you love them and they are not responsible for the breakup between the two of you.
- Try to spend as much time as possible with your kids. In case you are working, see to it that you have at least one meal together with your family. Remember that the menu is not important. What is important that you ensure that you spend some quality time with your kids, where you can discuss various issues and talk about their lives as well.
- Take interest in your kid’s day-to-day activities and interests. Never fail to show up at school performances and meetings.
- Engage your children in household activities and make them feel useful. This way, they will not have spare time to dwell in negative thoughts.
- Make such arrangements that help your kids spend time with both of you, so that they do not miss either of their parents.
- Jot down important dates in a wall calendar, even if your kids are grown up and old enough to remember them on their own. As you remind them the same, they will feel that you still care for them.
- Never try to justify your actions or your part in the separation, to your kids. Strictly keep them away from such matters. However, you can try to give a simple reason for the same, avoiding details and inner complications. However, while doing this, keep in mind the age group of the child. Toddlers and preschool children are not grown up enough to understand and handle such situations and revelations of such details may further complicate the matter. However, children in their late teens will be able to evaluate and understand the situation.
- Avoid any scenes or dramatic situations at home, in front of your children and firmly avoid the usage of harsh words or slangs.