Verbal abuse is hard to recognize and is a common type of abuse in a marital relationship. Read on to below to know more.

Verbal Abuse In Marriage

"Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner." - Amy Bloom. Yes, these are the questions most of couples ask themselves when they tie the knot and exchange marriage vows. How long will you be able to maintain your spouse’s dignity and respect? You cannot have easy answers to come by, as marriage requires immense trust and understanding between couples. Every marriage has its share of conflicts, but when they take the form of abuses of any type, be it physical, emotional or verbal, the marriage becomes a burden for the sufferers. There are lots of ideological and sociological factors involved in it. One of the forms of abuse is verbal abuse, because it often presumes a vocal form. A verbal abuse or any other form of domestic violence is not confined to any race, gender, background, or age. It can happen to anybody of any strata of the society. In many societies, dominance is a part of the culture and hence verbal abuse is silently accepted when compared to other forms of abuse. However, the reality is that verbal abuse is one of the most difficult forms of domestic violence and can rip a marriage apart. Verbal abuse can be defined as the methodical use of abusive language, especially used to make the spouse feel inferior, insecure, and a loser. The victims of verbal abuse suffer emotional breakdown, and take several years to heal. Read the article to recognize verbal abuse signs and the ways to deal with it. 
Signs And Symptoms Of Verbal Abuse In Marriage
Signs Of Verbal Abuse
  • Verbal abuse might be open or in hidden form. The open form of abuse can be through angry explosion, name-calling, and threats. Open verbal abuse is generally blaming the other partner and being critical of them. Hidden form of verbal abuse or aggression is done to gain total control over partner’s life. Both the situations are confusing to the partner.
  • During verbal abuse, the abuser attacks the character and abilities of the partner. This destroys the self-esteem of the victim and they begin to have doubts on their abilities. The victim starts believing that he/she is the problem rather than the partner.
  • Verbal abuse can be manipulative and damaging. The abuser voices the negative and critical comments in an extremely sincere and convincing way. The main aim of the abuser is to control the victim’s life in all possible ways.       
  • Verbal abuse is precarious to the self-esteem of the victim. The victims knowingly or subconsciously try to change their behavior so as not to upset the abuser.
  • Verbal abuse is erratic and unpredictable. The victim is stunned, traumatized, and terrified by the abusers cynicism, heated digs, critical remarks, and insensitive statements.
  • Sometimes the abuser expresses harsh messages between what they speak and what they mean. Like the abuser might sound very genuine and honest in his/her opinions while in reality the abuser is accusing his/her partner of something being wrong with him/her.
  • Verbal abuse begins with small digs disguised as jokes and then intensifies as time goes by. Sometimes verbal abuse might escalate into physical abuse beginning with unintentional pushes and bashes. 
Types Of Verbal Abuse 
  • Withholding information, feelings, and seclusion of the victim.
  • Countering and correcting everything about the victim.
  • Obstructing the victim to express own thoughts and opinions.
  • Disguising verbal abuse in the form of jokes.
  • Blocking and sidetracking any possibilities of resolving conflicts.
  • Blaming, sarcasm and accusing the victim.
  • Judging and criticizing the partner.
  • Undermining and threatening
  • Ordering and treating the partner like a slave.
  • Being rude and unconcerned.
  • Name calling and taking digs.
  • Extreme jealousy and mood swings.
  • Emotional blackmail.
  • Denial of abusing partner. 
How To Deal With Verbal Abuse In Marriage 
  • Get help by accepting and recognizing being verbally abused.
  • Get proactive and ask support from family, friends, and support groups.
  • Counseling and therapy.

How to Cite

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