“Marriages are sacred” is what people in the earlier centuries kept chanting to themselves until it sunk in and they endured the worst of tempestuous storms to make it last. Marriage is described as a pure institution according to several religious beliefs. Married individuals are often too mortified to breach this holy sacrament for fear of facing the wrath of god and burning in the fires of hell. Today, things are, however, not the same as before. We live in a reformed world - a world where we make our own rules! If the marriage isn’t working out, we can go our separate ways and write a new chapter. However, failed marriages, today as well, have unhealthy repercussions and must be avoided by all means. There are two different approaches to save a marriage. Either you make amendments by arriving at reasonable level of compromise or ascertain the compatibility before tying the knot. Thanks to the increasing number of failed or broken marriages, the Church, in the present times, has declared premarital counseling mandatory for those wishing to exchange vows in front of a church altar. Let’s delve deeper into a few relevant aspects of pre marriage counseling.
Pre Marriage Counseling
Need For Pre Marriage Counseling
As people have become smarter and are better exposed to the loose lifestyles depicted on television, the sanctity of marriage has inadvertently been diluted. Selfishness dominates as demands multiply. Couples are, generally, reluctant to sacrifice their desires, which are often the foundation of the arguments. Agreed, the concept of a lavish wedding is infinitely exciting, but the question is, whether the couple is prepared to take up the long term responsibilities which would soon materialize after the knot is tied? Hence, it is essential for the newlyweds-to-be to introspect and figure out how compatible they are. Can they envision a bright future? Or would it be a waging war where the only winner will be the closest divorce lawyer?
Benefits Of Pre Marriage Counseling
Pre marriage counseling plays a crucial role in stabilizing unstable relationships and encouraging partners to settle conflicts. Moreover, pre marriage counseling often helps two youthful and naïve individuals dodge what could be one of the biggest bullets of their lives. On the other hand, these counseling sessions aid in bringing estranged to-be-spouses together, possibly reviving intense passion that was withering away. Counselors paint a picture of the future marital problems, thus cautioning them of the hardships endured by almost every married couple. Finance, commitment, communication, and sex are all inevitable factors to be discussed into a newly blossoming marriage. Topics such as children and building a family spring up! Premarital counseling subtly prepares the newbies for this field.
Factors To Consider Before Pre Marriage Counseling
Before you mount the precarious terrain of marriage, attending premarital counseling sessions with your fiancé might be a good idea. This could last for two sittings to few months, but isn't it better to be safe than sorry? Here are a few pointers you should keep in mind before you seek counsel with regards to opening a new chapter of your life.
- You have to hunt for the type of pre-marital counseling that best suits your pre-requisites. How do you chance upon such a counselor? Scan the internet listings or local yellow pages. Search under the options for professional marriage counselors or family therapists.
- If you have doubts about the counselor’s skills and abilities, cross-examine his/her track-record. Contact other couples who have consulted this very same counselor and have reaped tremendous benefits in the long run.
- Check your budget. Is it worth it? Isn’t it better to shed a few notes than to suffer a nasty post-married life? No doubt it can be expensive, but perhaps you could trim down wedding costs as the welfare of your marriage comes first. However, don’t blindly select an expensive counselor under the premise that since he charges more, his advice will be better. Not true!
- Ensure that you as well as your partner are comfortable with opening up and sharing your woes with a third party. There is no point walking into a therapist’s room and walking out with minimal interaction. You have to participate in the healing process! It’s your problem, not that of the counselor’s!
- Pick a timing that doesn’t clash with you or your partner’s schedule. Set aside sufficient time to make things work! Be regular!
You must have a good background on the objective of pre marriage counseling. If you think you might need it, don’t think twice! Go for it!