Do your friends constantly try to win favors and rewards from you? If yes, stop being a doormat and get a spine with these tips on how to become assertive.

How To Become Assertive

Take a long and hard look at your best friend, girlfriend, colleagues and folks and think if these people whom you consider as your allies, genuinely care about you? Or are they sticking out with you due to any hidden motive? When you go out for dinner or shopping with your chums, is it you who has to cough up the dough every time? Do your office pals put up with you so that they can get a free ride back home each day? Well, if these moochers and self-seekers constantly hound you, then it is time for you to put your foot down and assert your worth emphatically. You don’t really have to put up with all the wrongs for the fear of jeopardizing your kinship. It is better to be out of favor than be constantly put down by these so-called friends. Get your voice and chuck out these favor seekers out of your chest for good. You might miss a few friends in that way, but then it’s a small price to pay for reclaiming your dignity back. Surf through the section that follows for tips on how to be assertive, and get your spine back!
Becoming Assertive 
  • Do you hate being a pushover? If yes, then stop compromising on your values right away. If you don’t wish to be treated as a doormat, then you have to stand up for yourself and uphold your dignity. However, before you go, take care that you are sure-footed enough and have a strong value system to fall back on. Also, cut out the question tags, disclaimers and question statements from your speech and yes, learn to lash out a “no”.
  • Don’t forget that the world has little respect for someone who doesn’t have a spine of his own. Just because you wish to win the Mr. Popular tag doesn’t have to mean that you become a bootlicker.  Stay away from self-limiting attitudes like smiling or nodding too much and agreeing with everything your friends and folks have to say. Assert your say emphatically and resist giving into interruptions.
  • Always follow your instincts. If you feel you have been wronged, then its best to address your grievances right away than stomach them coldly. Speak up. You don’t really have to draw a fist to make your point. Just sit back and discuss the issues calmly. Not only will it resolve all differences, but will also change how others perceive and treat you.
  • It is impossible to please everybody every time! If your reluctance to hurt others often tramples down your own well-being, then maybe it’s time you stopped being a wimp and asserted your say more vigorously. You don’t have to put up with all nags and bothers apologetically. Just put your foot down and say “no” once in a while.
  • Pick your battles carefully! Practice caution when swanning your newfound assertiveness with a crazy cabbie, or your boss, or else you might end up as a road rage victim or losing your job. However, don’t run away from confrontations. Instead, always speak up your mind and try to work out a compromise.

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