How To Agree To Disagree In Your Relationship

Arguments and points of debates are common in a relationship. Each of us has something that set us off easily, and these are at times referred to as “hot buttons”. It might be as simple as leaving the toilet seat up or down, or could be a bigger issue such as political positions or religious beliefs. Your partner would have these hot buttons too, and it doesn’t make any sense to set them off or antagonize them, because it will anyway end up as a losing proposition. In many cases, you will just need to accept the fact that there are issues on which you and you partner will not see eye to eye. It is these cases where you will need to agree to disagree with your partner, respectfully. After all, a healthy relationship is not predicated only on the similarities that a couple shares, but rather on the ability of the couple to disagree on sensitive issues. How the couple agrees to disagree on these issues shows the health of the relationship. Read on to know the ways to agree to disagree in your relationship. 

 

There are times when a couple argues, they would each want to focus on just winning the argument. If this happens to you, don’t get deceived. This is not always the right way to go about it. Check inwardly on what motivates you. If you figure out that you are feeling competitive, admit this fact to yourself first. This will help you to be able to re-focus on the actual issue to be dealt with. Try to analyze what changes you will need to make in yourself in order to improve how you are feeling about a point. After all, just because you disagree with your partner on a liberal view, does not mean that he/ she is wrong. 

 

If you and your partner have agreed to disagree about something, take a deeper look at the issue. This issue might just be a hot button to trigger off an argument. Analyze your dominant feelings and emotions when it comes to this issue. It could be a point of sensitivity about something that happened in the past. Once you get to the heart of the matter, you will be able to grasp the dimensions of the issue in a better way. Quite often, not doing that can lead to full-blown fights, and even huge cracks in the relationship, that cannot be mended. 

 

Do not keep your mind and heart closed when you are discussing an issue on which you and your partner may not agree. If you have agreed to disagree, you will now need to do all your “inside homework” so that you will be able to handle the issue the next time it comes up. Listen to your partner and understand how he/ she feel about the particular issue. While neither of you may ever change your stand on it, you will at least be able to understand each other, and feel listened to. As you feel better heard and understood, you and your partner will be able to make proper choices in life, while drawing closer together.