What can make a better gift for a birthday than laughter and joy? Read on to grab a bunch of funny birthday quotations. Include these humorous quotes and sayings in your greeting cards.

Funny Birthday Quotes

Birthday is a joyous occasion and fun and frolic is an integral part of it. Although we grow older by a year and slowly approach the dreaded old age, the very thought of birthday brings to every face a spark of life and happiness. In case you are wilting away thinking of the increasing age, fret not. Instead, cheer up and enliven your mind and soul thinking of all the good things that come with getting old. Remember that growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional. Don't let the child element in you perish and you would always remain happy and encouraged to live life as it comes. Here is a list of funny birthday quotes to bring your sunny side up.
Funny Birthday Sayings
  • Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake. - Anonymous
  • Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang, 'Happy Birthday.' - Steven Wright
  • The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape. - Samuel Johnson
  • Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Father Larry Lorenzoni
  • Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty. - Robert Frost
  • A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. - Erma Bombeck
  • Like many women my age, I am 28 years old. - Mary Schmich
  • People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit. - George Burns
  • A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
  • There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
  • You know you're getting old when all the names in your black book have M.D. after them. - Arnold Palmer 
  • There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. - John Mortimer
  • No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating. - Oscar Wilde
  • Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the hell happened? - Cora Harvey Armstrong
  • Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative. - Maurice Chevalier
  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not. - Mark Twain
  • I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do. - Phyllis Diller
  • Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - C.E.M. Joad
  • Let us respect gray hairs, especially our own. - J. P. Sears
  • Age is a high price to pay for maturity. - Tom Stoppard
  • If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes. - Euripides
  • Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you have not committed. - Anthony Powell
  • Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything. - Moe, from the Simpsons

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