Think of foster parenting and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie come to mind. This celebrity couple made ‘fostering’ uber cool. Indeed adopting children had come a long way from the days when people had inhibitions doing so. Nowadays more and more people are adopting children even if they have the chance to bear a child. The reasons can vary from couples to couples like ‘making a change’ to ‘controlling population’ to ‘saving a child’. At a time when thousands of children are orphans and homeless, adoption is a positive step towards making the world a better place to live.
For foster parents the challenge is manifold. They are constantly under the lens, not only of the foster children but also of the society. Many people find it difficult to cope with this constant scrutiny, which leads to a strained relationship between the children and the parents. Therefore, it is imperative that one must consider this aspect adopting. one step at a time. So, if you are a foster parent or planning to adopt, then read the article below for tips on foster parenting.
Tips On Foster Parenting
- Make the foster kids feel the warmth and tenderness. Initially the kids can be difficult as they are distrustful about you. It is better to leave them alone when they wish to. Try and make them feel welcome without making them feel that you are doing them a favor. Your relationship should be based on trust and compassion. More often than not these kids have faced abuse and neglect, so be prepared if they treat you with the same distrust.
- Understand your foster kids and the best way to do this is to spend quality time with them. Distil into them that you will always be there for them. Have dinner, go for movies or outings so that you are together with your kids as much as possible. Never make them feel lonely. When you spend time with the foster kids they will rely on you more and more and gradually make you their emotional support. Remember that you have to go the extra mile.
- Just because you have adopted them doesn’t mean that you do not impose any restrictions. Treat them as you would treat your own kids. It is better to supervise and monitor your foster kids. Gradually make them understand that they must respect your preferences. Kids are very good at emotional blackmailing and so be prepared that they will use the weapon that you are not their real parents more often.
- Don’t let your foster child hide inside a shell. When kids are taken from their familiar environment they tend to withdraw. So, encourage your foster kid, without forcing, to involve him or her in constructive activities like sports and after school programs.
- Several surveys have found out that foster children are more prone to drug and alcohol abuse. They also tend to indulge in sex at a very young age. Talk to them about all these topics and also encourage them to talk to you. Make them feel that you will always give an understanding ear to all their problems.
- Help your foster kids prepare for the future by leaving open various options which they can pursue. Give them the hope for a better future and motivate them to work towards it.