If adults themselves find it a herculean task to control their anger, imagine how hard it is for a child to do the same. Learn how to help your child manage her anger.
Start From You
The best way to teach your child to channelise his/her anger better is to internalize the process first, i.e. by managing your own anger first. If you keep your cool, there is every possibility that your child will forget his/her anger faster and will become his/her normal, chirpy self again.
How? Where? When?
The next thing, that a parent must learn, as well as teach his/her child to do is to identify the situations, people, and responses that trigger such angry outbursts. Maybe a certain classmate at school, perhaps the class bully, makes your child flare up in anger. Or, it could be a certain way you respond to his requests. When you ask a child to identify and let you know what makes him/her angry, listen carefully and attentively without moralizing or patronising. It will make you child feel that he/she is validated.
Adults are adept at camouflaging their anger under the garb of control and self-restraint; children cannot; which is precisely why it is easier to predict the onset of an angry outburst. You can use this use this knowledge to help your child identify them too so that he can control it better – it could range from his face turning red to his muscles tightening and turning tense.
After your child had channelized his anger better, reward him with love and attention. Take him in your arms and sooth him, watch cartoons with him, so you both can have a good laugh. At this stage, it would be rewarding, if you explained to your child the fact that he is not alone in his anger – that everyone, even you, gets angry, but also make sure he knows that it is up to him to channelize his anger constructively.
More from iloveindia.com