How To Deal With A Cheating Spouse

The questions running unchecked in your head, at this time, would be – what should I do? Should I confront him/her? Or should I just leave and go? Someone once said – it is easy to leave and go; the real test is to stay and make it work. But, the final decision is yours to make. If you want out, then lawyers, court cases and money matters come into play. However, if you want to stay and sort it out, then this write up gives you ideas on how to approach the whole issue. Visiting a counselor or a friend can prove extremely helpful at this point of time. But what you need the most, at this point, is courage, evidence and the mental strength to speak out. Leave the rest to the moment of confrontation. Everyone wants their own happy ending in life – because if it’s not happy, it’s definitely not the end! So, put a stop to your worries right now by reading what you can do.

Dealing With Cheating Partners

Prepare yourself mentally with the choice of words you are going to use. If you have too much information at once then put them down as points, so you remember what all to include in the confrontation.
Choose a private time and space before you start talking to him/her about the issue. Start by saying that you know about your partner’s infidelity.
Make it clear that you are upset and angry and that what happened was not fine. But, say that you are willing to make a compromise since you love him/her too much. Do not raise your voice till absolutely necessary.
Be sure to ask if the affair with the other person is over. Talk about how you’ve lost faith in them and also tell them that you are willing to rebuild it – again.
An important tip is not to break down and cry. Even though it hurts to see your marriage, or relationship, going down, you still have a second chance to regain your partner back.
Set clear demands and guidelines of what your partner should and must give you in return for what has happened. Even after saying it, you have to believe that no agreement can be reached unless he/she actually shows you it is going to work.
At this point, you will know if your partner is guilty of having an affair and is sorry about it or he wants the relationship to break off. If he/she wants you back, they will pay attention to every word and will want to hug you at every point. If he/she doesn’t care about the relationship, then they will be least interested in what you’re saying. Clash of the egos is the hardest obstacle to get past! But bending backwards for someone who doesn’t respect you is not exactly a smart idea. You are a person in your own and you deserve every ounce of respect from your partner.
After coming to a common agreement about your life together, make sure this is what both of you want.
It is not wrong for you to spy on your partner and pay attention to every single move that he/she makes. Actions must be a proof of the words but remember not to block their space too much.
Finally, if you are happy with the changes that your partner has made for you, then forgive him/her. Remember, the only person who can mend your broken heart, is the one who broke it.
An important thing during this time is not to withdraw into a shell or make any rash and impulsive decisions. You need some healing time too!

Hope these tips have given you enough strength to move forward and deal with a cheating spouse/partner. Remember, it is compromises that make you go further in life but striking a balance between self respect and compromise is a must for a truly satisfied life.

How to Cite

Related Articles

See also

More in 'Society'