Do you wish to go back to the time when you had hurt your child or overreacted? If yes, then this article would be of help. As parents, almost all of you would agree to making mistakes with our child. You might have said something or done something hurtful in the heat of the moment and are now regretting the same. Remember, no one is perfect and that there comes a time when even the coolest person can lose his control. However, that does not entitle you to be ‘bad’ parents. The key is to learn from what had happened, render a sincere apology to your child and move on, learning from the past mistakes. A genuine apology has great power to undo all your mistakes. It would not only make things better, but also give you an insight to help avoid any such conflict in the future. Remember, when you apologize to a child, it shows your willingness to accept the responsibility for your actions. This way, you are also teaching your child the power of forgiveness. In case you are having difficult to apologize to your child and are wondering how to go about it, read on and get some effective tips.
Apologizing To Your Children
- First of all, you need to understand that apology is not as important as realization. You need to realize that you have incurred an error. Accepting the responsibility of a mistake is a crucial step. Only if you do this will your confession sound genuine and right from the heart.
- In case you are in an extremely bad temper, try to get out of the place and remain in isolation. This would help you assess what had happened and why did it take place. Try to get back to a calm and quiet mood.
- Once you have calmed yourself, it is time for confession. Apologize directly to your child, in a simple manner. Try to convey the regret or sadness you are feeling at the moment, for being rude earlier.
- At the time of apologizing, make sure you do not demean yourself. Remember, you are saying sorry for your behavior and not for what you are. For instance, instead of saying ‘I am sorry I am a thoughtless and impatient mother’, it would be good to say, ‘I am sorry I lost my temper and called you worthless’.
- One of the very important aspects of the repenting process is not to blame the child for your behavior. Many-a-times, parents apologize to the child just by shifting the blame on him/her. This diminishes the effectiveness of an apology. So, instead of being accusatory and starting the fight all over gain, just accept that you had made a mistake.
- Just like repentance, review is also very important. It sets a level of understanding between the parents and the children. Once you have apologized, sit with your child and review what had happened and how it could have gone better. Ask what you could have done differently to avoid the problem. Discuss the problem and come to a conclusion on how both of you would deal with a similar matter in future.
- Do not forget to ask for forgiveness from your child. Remember, by asking for forgiveness, you are not belittling yourself. Instead, you are reinforcing your feelings of regret, while giving your child an understanding of the power of forgiveness.
- Once your child has forgiven you, just move on. Do not dwell on it and feel guilty of what had happened. Remember, to err is human and the important thing is to acknowledge your mistake. Remind yourself of all of the good things you have done as a parent and that this event is now also one of them.