Death is the biggest, and probably the harshest, tragedy of life and the loss of life humbles you, even when the deceased is not very close to you. However, death needs to be acknowledged just like the other facets of life. Offering condolences is not one of the easiest things to do and can make one feel uncomfortable, as you know that it can cause more pain to be bereaved. On the other hand, you can’t behave casually as if life just goes on and no one is indispensable. Therefore, it becomes important to know what to say when someone dies, so that you are not at a loss of words at such situations. Follow the article to know the right things to say on someone’s death.
Things To Say When Someone Has Died
- “I can’t imagine what you’re going through, but I do care and realize that you are in pain.” The statement holds a lot of truth and is quite realistic for the simple reason that it is actually impossible to relate to the loss of the bereaved, as you are not in his/her situation. To say that you care and realize the pain of those who have suffered the loss is a sensible enough thing to say in such situations.
- Ask if you could help the bereaved family in any way. “Can I do the grocery shopping, or pick up the kids?” will convey that you are really concerned and willing to help the mourners in whatever way you can. While they will find several people to offer them condolences, you might be one of the only few who are willing to go a step ahead and lend them a helping hand, when they need it the most.
- The death of a loved one can send the family members in a state of shock and they may not be willing to talk about it any time soon. Let them buy their own sweet time and don’t insist them to speak up at that very moment, as a lot of people tend to do. The best you can do is, to be around when the other person would want to talk about it, though it may take some time. However, be ready to listen when the other person wants to talk about the loss.
- “Cry. It’s OK. I’m here for you” is just the right thing to say on somber situations. This makes the bereaved feel that you realize what he/she is going through. It also gives the mourner an opportunity to express his/her feelings, as he/she may be too shattered to react on receiving the news.
What Not To Say
- “I know what you’re going through...”
- “It will get better; time heals all wounds.”
- “Don’t cry; cheer up.”
- "Your loved one is waiting for you on the other side. It was meant to happen.”
- “Let’s not think about the past.”
- “Be brave. Be strong. Hang in there.”
- “Let’s not talk about it; it’ll upset you too much.”